The Washington Post
WORLD
Where World News and National Security Intersect
Iranian Sub Takes Osama bin-Laden’s Body
By Joel Greenbaum, May 22, 6:22 PM
WASHINGTON D.C. – Today it was reported that unusual submarine activity was reported in and around the deep-sea burial site of Osama bin-Laden. Pentagon officials have been mum, but many have speculated that the body of terrorist Osama bin-Laden has been snatched from the ocean deep.
With not even a month in his cold wet grave bin-Laden seems to be now in the hands of the Iranian Revolutionary Guard. Reports are leaking out of the White House that it was one of Iran’s new subs commissioned last year.
It appears that the heavily reinforced body bag of bin-Laden was meant to be found by the Defense Department since it was dropped down to nearly eleven thousand feet with a GPS signaling device. Obviously, it seems that the Iranians have discovered the top-secret frequency used by the device and quickly snatched the body.
Further reports indicate that Mahmoud Ahmadinejad will be making a special announcement to the world from Tehran.
“At this point” said Vice President Biden, “we have nothing to say, sorry.”
Copyright #38629442 – The Washington Post
President Obama finished reading the article off the wire and promptly threw up. It landed everywhere, the desk, chair, rug and his new suit. It was embarrassing, since he was with a group of his trusted aids in the Oval Office. As he quickly headed for the side bathroom where Monica and Bill used to rendezvous this President was there for another reason - cleanup.
As he emerged brushing off chunks of beef and noodles Romanof he yelled “That God-damn Iranian is wrecking my party and I won’t stand for it.” Then he immediately belched up more remaining pieces of beef which caused his torso to buckle in a giant cramp that sent him back to the toilet where he nearly plunged his entire head into the commode.
Vice President Biden couldn’t understand why the President was blowing dinner since Michelle cooked it, a tradition in the Obama family, the dinner, not the throwing up, as the 840th day of Obama Presidency kept flushing.
This is from the novel Now the Eagle by Nicholas Contompasis about the Obama Administration. This is fiction. It should not in any way be considered factual. We hope you enjoy this tongue-in-cheek novel of the Obama Presidency. The author has taken the liberty to use these factitious, factual events and individuals to express his concerns and fears of this Administration. Read more of this novel here http://nowtheeagle.blogspot.com/
4 comments:
The latest subs that iran acquired is 150 meters.
That fact totally bunga bunga's your article on taking osama's body.
That's what the Defense Department thought
Even if that story were true, (which there is no way that it is). The pressure at 11,000 feet deep would be 5,016 pounds per square inch! I don't care how 'reinforced' the body bag is; the guy would be soup.
Not to mention To every action there is always an equal and opposite reaction: If 5,016lb/sqft is pressing in, then 5,016lb/sqft is pressing out. If the bag had a zipper of any sort the outward pressure would have squeezed his body through the holes, or broken the zipper flooding the bag.
Furthermore! If someone hadn't actually considered those environmental variables and tagged it with GPS so that they could 'recover it later' we are even more screwed governmentaly than we are aware of because everything that I just spoke about was thanks to common sense and 2 google searches. It's certainly not rocket science, and that's a scary prospect when you consider the kind of tripe that get elected these days.
Thx for your comment and factual information. I'll make sure we move the body up a little ways. How's 4,000 feet sound? ; )
Again this is fiction, a part of my novel which now is being read by thousands around the world. They love it.
Post a Comment