Monday, June 21, 2010

2:01 P.M. Monday June 21st 2010 Oval Office Bathroom

The President was pleased to see that his plumbing was back to normal. After his heralding episode with that oily fish sandwich last week it was a good feeling. He pulled up his zipper as he exited the bathroom with confidence knowing that there would be no more intestinal disruptions.
His post Father’s Day Bar-B-Q went smooth, without a mess-up on his part, and the ribs were fabulous. However, two things stuck in the President’s claw this afternoon. The Senator Kyl YouTube statement, and the Rahm Emanuel early departure rumor. He knew these fires needed to be put out and put out fast. His credibility and confidence was at stake. He knew of Rahm’s desire to head back to Chicago to take over Daley’s Mayoral position. But why did he leak it now, he thought? Rahm is a smart guy, that midget knows how and when to get information out and this leak was signaling that the rats were jumping ship.
The Senator Kyl video flatly stated that he could care less about people on the border and was holding back troops to defend them. Not until the Republicans rolled over on immigration reform was he going to protect the border. All of this was true and most of the country knew it based on recent polls. This was not good as he thought about escaping to the golf course with somebody nonpolitical.
He breezed through his Economic Reform group meeting at 2:30. The President couldn’t help but think what idiots these people were thinking that he wanted the economy to grow. Even the common tea bagger knew what he was up too, but not these high priests of economics.
“Susan, please set up a meeting with Panetta for Wednesday.” “Yes sir.” He knew he was to meet Putin’s puppet President Medvedev of Russia on Thursday. With the G-8 meeting in Canada on Friday he needed to be up to speed on Putin’s games. This gave the President perfect cover for his inquiry into the BP Deepwater Horizon videos that the agency was after. He wondered if Soros was doing anything about this. I guess his ass wasn’t so on the line, like mine, he thought. Just about the only thing that went well this month was his plea-bargain with BP. He sure had them by the balls as the President dwelled on the only thing that made him happy this moment.
As the Jewish-American Captain of the U.S.S. Harry Truman took to his bridge, the sea was not kind to him today. His briefing with the Israelis on board went well. He thought how devoted these young soldiers are to their mission. Such perfection has been nearly lost these days. When your land, family and life is on the line you better perform or else, he thought. “Captain, you have a secured call from Israel, its Defense Minister Ehud Barak. Did you want to take that in your office?” “Yes, Phil, patch him in, in about 2 minutes.”
Barack looked across the room at his entire Senior Staff who got the message, show up or else. He knew they could care less about the job now and most have already set up fat positions with the new Health Care bureaucracy. I’m getting that lonely feeling again, the President thought as day 507 of the Obama Presidency went through the motions.

Special Note:This is a fictitious story based on factual and fictitious events and individuals. It should not be considered factual in any way. We hope you enjoy this daily fictitious tongue-in-cheek story of the Obama Presidency.

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